Time to Fly

We dropped the boys off at Type 1 Diabetes Camp on Sunday. They will be there until Saturday.  I'm not going to lie, this was one of the hardest things I've had to do recently and yes, I cried off and on on the way home, especially seeing their life saving kits in the van minus them.  Surreal.  Those kits go everywhere, they are always attached to them or within reach.  We never leave the house without them.  They literally save their lives daily.  I know that sounds extreme but it is true.  Those kits have insulin and without it they would die.  Those kits have fast acting sugar and without it they would die.  Those kits are the tools that balance their lives.  And they don't have them while at camp.  Instead we are relying on counsellors and nurses and doctor's to take the place of us and those kits so the boys can have a week "off".  They'll never really get a break so this is about as close to one that they can have--no kits attached to them.  Surrounded by people and kids that know what they are going through.

Sugar Bear didn't want to go.  He's never really been away from home without one of us with him.  Yes, Drago is there too but he's with the older kids.  Plus only his Dad, his brother, my Mom, and me have ever given him his shots and tested his blood sugar.  He's the one I'm worrying about.  I'm sure he's in capable hands but his lows recently have been low lows (39, 47) and he's not really feeling them and then the fact he had three focal seizures last year and the increased activity.....well, makes my stomach tie in knots.  Had we gotten the Dexcom in time I might not feel this anxious.  I'm not terribly worried about Drago.  Drago was excited to go.  

The silver lining is that I'm already more rested and have been able to connect with my husband without Type 1 rearing it's ugly head.  I'm working through emotions I haven't had a chance to address since Sugar Bear was diagnosed.  It's a growing experience for all of us.  The mama bird pushed her babies out of the nest hoping they will fly.